Not unlike its lead, THE TRANSPORTER REFUELED is a stiff in every regard.However, when Frank's father, Frank Senior (Ray Stevenson) retires from life as an global sales representative for Evian water, a group of well-organized criminals use the elder Martin to draw the Transporter into a dangerous high-stakes battle with powerful Russian crime lord, Arkady Karasov (Radivoje Bukvic). Whenever he’s on screen, the film has a bit of a pulse, just because we’re finally watching someone who is a flesh and blood human being, not a walking mannequin. – is a man who you believe can kick ass, chat up the ladies, stare down danger and just generally live life to the fullest.
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Watching Stevenson (who, understandably, clearly relished his role), it becomes stunningly clear that a movie focusing on his character would be a lot more fun than what we have here. is a major league cad, rather enjoying his time around the women who kidnap him and use him as leverage. The thing worth speaking of is Ray Stevenson, who plays Frank’s dad, a former spy who gets caught up in Frank’s whirlwind. Delamarre paints a pretty picture once in a while (thanks mostly to the scenic French locations) but he can’t make us care about any of it. The silly script, moronic as it is, would be acceptable if the action were exciting, but it’s incredibly by-the-numbers stuff, car chases and beatdowns that are neither intense nor special in any way.
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I’ve never encountered such a dumb movie that thinks its audience is even dumber. But Delamarre and screenwriters Bill Collage, Adam Cooper and Luc Besson (yes, him again) are so lunkheaded about every aspect of the thing it’s stupefying you have characters explaining their actions every step of the way, hilarious on-the-nose references (Frank opines that the girls have modeled themselves after The Three Musketeers at one point and then we cut to Alexandre Dumas‘ book sitting right there!), subtitles when they’re not needed the list goes on.
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If you were searching for this bunch, you wouldn’t have to look very far just follow the girls who look exactly the same and the noisiest driver in the land.īut that’s fine as stated, we don’t expect anything too subtle from a movie like this. They need Frank’s help to drive them around while they do this, but both they and Frank are so conspicuous about what they do it’s amazing they’re not caught constantly: The girls all wear matching outfits and wigs (as one villain helpfully puts it, it’s so we can’t tell them apart!) while Frank drives around like a madman, smashing everything in sight. An intense young woman named Anna (Loan Chabanol) and three other model-pretty gals go about elaborately ripping off their Eurotrash pimp (Radivoje Bukvic) and turning him against his equally sleazy cohorts. Said film has the flimsiest of plotlines not that we expect anything Shakespearean out of a TRANSPORTER movie, but this is pretty dull stuff. Skrein is about as intimidating as a waiter in an extravagant restaurant, and that hinders the character and the movie, because if we don’t think of The Transporter as a dude you don’t want to f*ck with, you’re not going to be very invested in the film. Statham seems like a man who could go off at any second, an intimidating brawler who bad guys should watch out for. THE TRANSPORTER REFUELED gives the character of Frank Martin a young retooling in the form of Ed Skrein, who most of us know as “that guy who played Dario Naharis for a few episodes on Game of Thrones.” Keeping with the movie’s commercial aesthetic, Skrein appears to have walked off the page of a glossy Calvin Klein ad he’s a handsome guy with an impressive jawline, but he’s neither imposing nor interesting as a screen presence. Most distressingly, even Jason Statham couldn’t have saved this dreck.Īnd man, is Statham ever missed. The film is hollow, silly and pointless it’s not even good on a “mindless action romp” level. In one of its very first scenes, director Camille Delamarre lovingly gives us about four different, loving angles of a parked Audi ostensibly, we’re taking a look at the Transporter’s bitching ride, but in reality it’s a not-too-subtle plug for the car company, and a good indicator of what’s to come. REVIEW: Watching THE TRANSPORTER REFUELED is like watching the longest car commercial in the world. PLOT: Frank Martin, transporter of mysterious goods, finds himself entangled with a bevy of sexy ladies as they attempt to rip off their brutal pimp.